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"And the stars are projectors, yeah, projecting our lives down to this planet Earth." - Modest Mouse


4.07.2004

Porn or the Gnome Gets It 

The New Jersey Times-Beacon reports on a recent atrocity that's got local police in a frenzy. Tuckerton residents Denny Lyons and Laney Rice have had one of their lawn gnomes stolen and ransomed.
The ransom note states: "If you ever want to see your gnome again, leave three snickers bars, two Yoo-hoo's and one Coke and the newest Playboy edition in the baseball dugout 3 p.m. Sunday. Don't try anything tricky or else you'll never see your gnome again. The Gnome Bandits."

On Monday, Rice recieved a second ransom note stating: "This is not funny. You put one thing we wanted in the box. We ain't joking. We could do serious damage to your little precious gnome."
Police tried unsuccesfully to snag the Bandits with a clever sting operation.
After getting the note, police then set a box at the field trying to lure the people who did it, but they had no success in capturing the perpetrators, Sgt. Michael Caputo said.

"We're on the lookout for it," Caputo said. "At this point in time we think that it's a couple of kids playing a joke."

"But we are continuing to investigate," Caputo said.
Suffice it to say that the Tuckerton PD has some free time on its hands.

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